I recently wrote an article titled “Do something!” The gist was if we have an unmet need, the action step of NVC—the request—is how we meet the need and move from frustration and helplessness toward satisfaction and relief.
For much of my life, I felt helpless when my needs were not met. NVC changed my life by teaching me that I can take action to meet my needs. I no longer must hope and wish for my needs to be met. I can “Do something.”
Identifying feelings and needs is connecting… and taking action is empowering.
If taking a step to meet a need seems to be more than we can manage, then perhaps the first step is to build capacity.
How can we build capacity? The answer to that question will vary for each of us, depending on the circumstances. We can start with baby steps.
For me, it’s often connecting with nature (being outside/walking) or connecting with people. These things often build my energy and bring me to life. For others, it might be playing or listening to music, taking a nap, or meditating.
What is it that restores you?
If we need help, we can reach out for support. An empathy buddy (or two!) can brainstorm, encourage, and help with accountability.
Rather than judgment, we can offer ourselves compassionate care and gentle nurturing actions to build capacity and resilience so that we will be able to meet our needs and serve life.
