How can we “Do NVC” when we’re both upset?

April 8, 2024 Bryn Hazell

What can we do when there is an escalating argument and both people are feeling increasingly angry and frustrated? Emotions are high and getting higher!

It’s a situation that’s likely familiar to all of us. …

Preparing for NVC

March 11, 2024 Bryn Hazell

When we’re learning Compassionate (Nonviolent) Communication, we practice with the four steps: Observations, Feelings, Needs, and Requests. Practicing these steps, learning the vocabulary, clarifying what’s a feeling, what’s a need, and what’s a request is more complicated than it seems at first.

However, practice does work, and eventually, those steps become easier… Finally, requests and observations can be made in more conversational language.

But it turns out there’s still more to do to prepare for a connecting conversation! …

Envision a world where needs will be valued equally and met peacefully

June 2, 2020 Bryn Hazell

Today is June 2 and I participated in a demonstration in downtown Bend. Hundreds of people gathered and then marched to show empathy, anger, and grief—calling for change around the issues arising from the death of George Floyd, the black man in Minneapolis who died with a policeman’s knee on his neck.

Many if not most of the people demonstrating appeared to be in their teens, 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s. I felt heartened to see so many young people participating. They were calling for racial justice, the end to police brutality, accountability, and valuing Black Lives. Many people in passing cars honked in support.

A few Bend police officers were there to “make sure everyone gets to go home safely” as one officer said to me. I saw these police engaged in friendly conversation with demonstrators and then stepping in when traffic help was needed to make sure cars and pedestrians could all pass. They were there to protect.

One of the tenets of Compassionate (Nonviolent) Communication is that we envision a world where all people’s needs will be valued equally and met peacefully. Today’s demonstration and the following statement help to bring me hope and encouragement.

Message from Bend Police Chief Jim Porter: …